Valley Journal
Valley Journal

This Week’s e-Edition

Current Events

Latest Headlines

What's New?

Send us your news items.

NOTE: All submissions are subject to our Submission Guidelines.

Announcement Forms

Use these forms to send us announcements.

Birth Announcement
Obituary

Toilet paper shortage considered

Hey savvy news reader! Thanks for choosing local. You are now reading
1 of 3 free articles.



Subscribe now to stay in the know!

Already a subscriber? Login now

Editor, 

There is a silver lining to the toilet paper shortage. Sewer repairmen are now paying for their kids’ college educations by removing paper towels (which don’t dissolve) from clogged sewer lines. Emergency weekend calls might also pay for a new boat.     

The average American uses 50 pounds of toilet paper per year. People panic with the fear of not having toilet paper. Anxieties increase when the brain senses no options. But there are options.      

Neanderthals used rocks and moss. Ancient Chinese used writing paper. The Romans had friendly communal toilet benches with many side-by-side holes. A bucket filled with seawater or vinegar contained a sponge tied to a long stick, which was then replaced into the bucket – ready for the next citizen. Progress happens. Modern commercial toilet paper (1857) had flat sheets of hemp infused with aloe. And we appreciate Thomas Crapper’s toilet tank invention in 1860. The paper roll appeared in 1890 and people are still arguing about which way to hang it. Around 1900, Sears Roebuck punched holes in the corner of catalogues so they could be hung in the outhouse.     

A modern option is a jet of water from a bidet, hot sellers this week. A cheaper version is a bucket of water and a turkey baster. Don’t forget the option of using small washcloths, which (like baby diapers) can be recycled endlessly in your washing machine. Calm down. And don’t flush paper towels.    

In his recent book, “The Psychology of Pandemics,” Steven Taylor explains that in prior pandemics there have always been issues of panic buying and using racism to place blame. Tribalism easily surfaces when a threat appears. Very basic in the individual’s neurological networks is the drive to maintain its life.      

There is such a thing as “healthy anxiety,” which is the alert system to danger. The trick is to use that “pay attention” constructively – social distancing, sanitation, vaccination.      

Another factor which emerges is “altruism” – the communal-good willingness to help others survive and thrive. What will humans learn from this current dilemma, to be ready for the next one? Hint: If you use rocks or moss, don’t flush them down.

Gene Johnson

Polson 

 

Sponsored by: