Be antidote: reach out to others
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What is the first image that comes to your mind when you hear the words “domestic violence?” For many, it is a black eye or other physical injury. But perhaps the even more insidious form of violence is emotional abuse, because the recipient carries it inside, where it can eat at a person until s/he has little to no feeling of self-worth. At that point a life can come tumbling down, as the person who is being emotional abused often feels worthless and actually undeserving of love.
And the sad fact is that often the abuser has been abused him or herself, creating a term we have all heard: the cycle of violence. October is Domestic Violence Awareness month, but it is not enough to be “aware.” We as human beings who care for each other need to reach out to those who are feeling insignificant or even worse, and let them know that they are worthy of love.
Trauma specialists all say that even just one caring individual in a person’s life can make all the difference – can help a person to become resilient and overcome adversity. So we can all become not only “aware” of domestic violence, but also an antidote to it – by extending a caring hand, and also simply by being a role model of someone who treats others with respect.
We are fortunate here in Lake County and the Flathead Reservation to have agencies that can assist when domestic violence has reached a crisis point (and even more importantly, before it has come to that point). SAFE Harbor is our area shelter, and also offers a weekly support group, legal assistance and other services. SAFE Harbor can be reached by calling 406-676-0800. The CSKT Crime Victim Assistance Program assists with Orders of Protection (“restraining orders”) and other needs. You can reach Mar or Trish by calling CSKT at 406-675-2700 and asking for the Victim Assistance Program. The Nest, which is still in the fundraising stage, will eventually be available to young pregnant and parenting moms who are escaping abusive situations. Information about The Nest may be obtained by calling 406-745-3757.
As was previously mentioned, intervention is most effective when it is preventative, rather than reactive. And in the words of psychiatrist and author Dr. Daniel J. Siegel, “With kindness and understanding, to yourself and to others, change can be nurtured, and good things can emerge.”
