Slices of Life
Northern cold versus southern cold
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I’m a recent transplant - from a northern state to a southern one. I now spend winters in Florida, but for most of my life, I endured the (harsh, frigid, bitter, unending, Arctic, hyperborean) winters of Minnesota, aka Minnesnowta (cold nose, warm heart).
I like to think it made me stronger. Hell, I know it did. You can’t survive and endure 30-degree negative temperatures (with a windchill of unspoken proportions) without cultivating some sort of inner fortitude (not to mention frostbit fingers).
It’s been a cold winter in the Florida. By, cold, I mean about May or September in Minnesota terms. The lows have hovered around the 40’s and 50’s. We’ve had a night or two in the mid 30’s. People cover their plants and wear winter coats to the grocery store. I’ve even seen gloves and a stocking cap or two, but I haven’t yet seen my breath.
People who think it’s cold when you can’t even see your breath outside don’t really understand cold. They’ve probably never even had their cheeks burn while walking from the car to the front door.
Let’s just put this out there: it doesn’t get cold in Florida. 50 degrees Fahrenheit is not cold. 40 degrees is not cold. Even 32 degrees, while technically freezing, isn’t cold - if you are from Minnesota.
In the north, we wear shorts in 32 degrees - without a second thought. Anything near or above freezing is not cold. We consider it warm.
We do the polar bear plunge into any one of our 10,000 frozen lakes, but before we dive into the cold water, we have to cut a hole through the ice to actually get there.
In the south, people complain when the pool temperature dips below 80 degrees (Fahrenheit).
In the south, it’s a blustery day if you have to wear socks. In the north, blustery requires layering two sets of leggings - before you put on your fleece-lined jeans. And that’s just for life inside your house.
Yesterday I was listening to the radio and a winter warning came on - for pets. The overnight low was a predicted 35 degrees and pet owners were advised to be cautious and careful about the hypothermia levels of their beloved’s paws.
In the north, humans are a sturdy lot, nearly impervious to the frigid temps. Pets take that one step further. They lie on the snow for a relaxed state of fun.
When it is really cold - like a windchill of negative 30 – we let them out and then in again within five minutes or less because, well, that’s the smart thing to do. When the weather is 35 degrees (above zero), we let them play outside for as long as they want because fur coats were invented for a reason, and that reason is winter.
Today I got a text message from the HVAC folks who service my unit. They reassured us that they are on call 24/7 during this cold snap, in case someone’s heater should stop working, causing an obvious emergency to ensue.
I had to stop myself from laughing. I’ve slept with an open window (and ceiling fan on) every night during this cold spell. Heat hasn’t even been in my vocabulary.
Winter in the north versus south is indeed very different - and I haven’t even touched on the subject of snow days. That’s probably a column all its own.
But let’s get down to the nitty gritty. We live in a very big, very beautiful nation. There is north, south, east and west and there is good in every corner. Some may find it in a white, sandy beach - others in a glistening white snowfall.
And there is beauty in both - and everything in between. Let’s all relish in that.
Jill Pertler is an award-winning syndicated columnist, published playwright and author. Don’t miss a slice; follow the Slices of Life page on Facebook.
